Lydia up in the night about 4 times. I kind of love the way she comes to find me and snuggles up right into me, fitting perfectly somehow, even though she's all arms and legs now. She wraps herself around my neck almost fiercely, not really awake and soon fast asleep again.
All of us woke up properly with the sunshine alarm clock at 645am. Lots of milk for Phoebe, Lydia very sad that the pants she wanted didn't exist. Managed to get Phoebe to lie looking at her mobile, so went to help Tom with Lydia. She calmed down eventually. And apparently was much more with it once she'd eaten a pancake whilst he took her to nursery.
Got dressed slowly around sorting Phoebe out, then had my NHS counselling/guided self help call at 9am. Overall I'm feeling way more positive mood wise, so we looked at ways to manage letting go of the intrusive thoughts and worries. I'm at my best when I've seen people, and I've been focusing on making that happen. Along side the scary 'What if?' type thoughts, I've realised that I've missed having opportunities I got with Lydia to show Phoebe off and get positive feedback on how cute she is and my parenting. This is probably one of the reasons I love seeing family so much at the moment as they tend to coo at the baby and be really positive about her, which makes me feel more positive.
After going shopping in the morning to get the bits I didn't pick up at the weekend, I dropped the food back home and went on to see my grandparents and then my aunt and uncle. They all cooed beautifully over the baby, and my grandparents were on great form after having been knocked for six by health issues in recent months. Thinking about the kind person who offered to unload my shopping into my car because I had Phoebe in the carrier.
Ran some errands for my brother in law on the way home, then home to do bedtime for both girls. Feeding Phoebe to sleep at the moment.