This Is Not Alex

Alex Jones is still... unavailable... and I realise I didn't tell you why.
I am Alex's internet... representative... "T". I've had some joyously diverting times and, now
that I'm the daddy here, I can tell you all about them.
The Jones family party took us late into Saturday night (including the song, of course). We
stuffed ourselves, played the best party games and did some particularly photogenic dancing.
Sunday was slow. I ended up at the House Of The Yellow Cushion, drinking Bailey's and watching
Family Guy till far too late.
Last night at the Curry House we fondid (a lot. Beef in oil; most things in cheese; marshmallows
and giant strawberries in chocolate), watched Black Books & Bill Bailey and said words beginning
with P. It got late. I had little sleep (at least, in bed), but a deliciously late morning (ie.
in at the rakish time of 8.40). Work involved the silent undressing of a Christmas tree; a lot of
Earl Grey and some other things that I won't tell you about just yet.
My painting now won't be needed for three weeks and I must do something different for this Sunday.
That will take time. I'm making cakes too. I'm making anything that will use up my superfluity
of treacle.
As a result of last night I am the subject of a Facebook application. Someone said I'm "quietly
awesome" (not "arsesome", treacherous fingers).
I went on an odyssey to Regent's Park to return a blackboard to a cats' home; and then took lots
of wallpaper samples from Wickes, thinking that there must be some artistic use for them. What I
actually bought was a dozen rolls of gaffer tape.
This evening SCM were to go bowling with the Atheist Society. Tom didn't get my text asking about
a lift. I went to Chaplaincy and found that I'd just missed the motor party. I walked home very
quickly, girded up my bicycle and rode very quickly to the bowling place, which, this year, is
called "Tenpin". Tebourba Way knackered my shoulders. We had fun and good company, although I
did some weird bowling stance and Helen kept laughing at me. I think Jens won over all. After a
while I went to leave. It was raining. I went back in to button up everything that could be
upbuttoned, in the absence of anything waterproof, and left. I had a flat tyre. Now, I don't
know if the Millbrook Pixies had paid a visit, or if I'd run over... one of them with their sharp
pointy hats... and I had to replace the other tyre only last week... but, despite Tom's pump
action, I'd have to walk home. But no: Charlie gave me a lift. Now I'm in at an almost-sensible
time and have not gone to Let's Kill Disco (http://www.letskilldisco.com/) to get Jupped up. Must
go next time.
Now: sleep.