Thursday, December 27, 2007

Of course, I have an essay to write, so I'm blogging...

...What did you expect?

I have nearly finished compiling my bibliography for this beastly essay, which seems to take as long as the actual writing process will.

Christmas was had. I wasn't feeling especially festive this year at all. I can see the signs of last year's January black dog reoccurring. This was not helped with my rents asking questions about my future that I can't answer. I have no idea what's happenning with the chaplaincy assistants job, I don't know which master course I'm going to be on, and no, I don't know where I will be living come next July. It just made me panic more. Christmas eve and Boxing day were horrid little episodes where I tried to stop myself from crying all the time, and I had the anxious knot on my chest like I couldn't breathe. The only time it lifted was at Midnight Communion, where Dad and I had our yearly competition to see who could sing the loudest. I wish I knew the proper soprano or alto parts to complement all the parts Dad learnt when he was in the choir. It did sound lovely.

I managed to be on my best behaviour on Christmas Day, being first down, and surprisingly cheery. This is most likely to do with the lovely soppy texts Tom was sending me on Christmas Eve. They reminded me that there's more to live for that mere career things. Soon I shall renounce it all and be the spinning weaving painting artist on a farm somewhere I've always wanted to be. With some sheeps. And a Tom. Hopefully. Anyway, the Day itself went well, I curled up in front of my Auntie and Uncle's new stove in their new living, having decamped there from my Gran's for lunch. I played with babies and Barbies and was throughly gifted. My favourite presents were the awesome snuggly dressing gown from my rents, the red pijamas from my grandparents,( *) the anime picture of me and my sister's the littlest sister drew, and the fleecy hoodie the next sister down gave me. When we had finished eating the traditional turkey et all I enjoyed a phone call all the way from France from Tom, despite loosing the signal out in the sticks every five minutes and then went back to my Gran's to watch Love Actually. Which I did in my snuggly dressing gown, and managed to finish Tom's gloves. They are now wrapped up and in his stocking.

Getting back to mine last night was a relief, as the heat and manic-ness at my Gran's was making me feel a bit loopy. I had a huge cry and snotted into lots of hankies. I also tried to find a home for all my new stuff, and assembled the big mirror my rents had also bought me. Really I wanted to phone Tom and cry at him, but I thought that would make me a little too dependant on him, and probably make him feel miserable too. So I didn't. I tried not to think about my essay, had an earlish night for me, and got some good sleep.

Today I was out of bed by ten, went shopping for goodies with Mr. Hunt, my new honourary brother, and have sat here for the rest of the day, collating information. That sounds terribly productive, n'eh? I hope so. I actually feel like I'm in the position to write something, and blogging this has got me into the typing mood, which is what I hoped it would do. Please please please let me have written 2000 words by the time I go to bed tonight. And then I will write 2000 tomorrow. Before the lovely Tom comes home. Then I get to do Christmas with him.

Oh the lovely Tom. It's been very nice this season of talking to family to be able to talk about lovely things I've done with this lovely man. It's nice to be with someone who seems to actually want me around, just as I am. *does a few carthwheels in her head because she can't do them in real life*

* the red pjs are size 8 - 10 and they fit me. They may be of the cotton jersey variety, and slightly stretchy, but fitting into them brings me an insubordiate amount of joy. Must remember to do another 100 sit ups tonight. When I have written 2000 words.

Of course, I have an essay to write, so I'm blogging...

...What did you expect?

I have nearly finished compiling my bibliography for this beastly essay, which seems to take as long as the actual writing process will.

Christmas was had. I wasn't feeling especially festive this year at all. I can see the signs of last year's January black dog reoccurring. This was not helped with my rents asking questions about my future that I can't answer. I have no idea what's happenning with the chaplaincy assistants job, I don't know which master course I'm going to be on, and no, I don't know where I will be living come next July. It just made me panic more. Christmas eve and Boxing day were horrid little episodes where I tried to stop myself from crying all the time, and I had the anxious knot on my chest like I couldn't breathe. The only time it lifted was at Midnight Communion, where Dad and I had our yearly competition to see who could sing the loudest. I wish I knew the proper soprano or alto parts to complement all the parts Dad learnt when he was in the choir. It did sound lovely.

I managed to be on my best behaviour on Christmas Day, being first down, and surprisingly cheery. This is most likely to do with the lovely soppy texts Tom was sending me on Christmas Eve. They reminded me that there's more to live for that mere career things. Soon I shall renounce it all and be the spinning weaving painting artist on a farm somewhere I've always wanted to be. With some sheeps. And a Tom. Hopefully. Anyway, the Day itself went well, I curled up in front of my Auntie and Uncle's new stove in their new living, having decamped there from my Gran's for lunch. I played with babies and Barbies and was throughly gifted. My favourite presents were the awesome snuggly dressing gown from my rents, the red pijamas from my grandparents,( *) the anime picture of me and my sister's the littlest sister drew, and the fleecy hoodie the next sister down gave me. When we had finished eating the traditional turkey et all I enjoyed a phone call all the way from France from Tom, despite loosing the signal out in the sticks every five minutes and then went back to my Gran's to watch Love Actually. Which I did in my snuggly dressing gown, and managed to finish Tom's gloves. They are now wrapped up and in his stocking.

Getting back to mine last night was a relief, as the heat and manic-ness at my Gran's was making me feel a bit loopy. I had a huge cry and snotted into lots of hankies. I also tried to find a home for all my new stuff, and assembled the big mirror my rents had also bought me. Really I wanted to phone Tom and cry at him, but I thought that would make me a little too dependant on him, and probably make him feel miserable too. So I didn't. I tried not to think about my essay, had an earlish night for me, and got some good sleep.

Today I was out of bed by ten, went shopping for goodies with Mr. Hunt, my new honourary brother, and have sat here for the rest of the day, collating information. That sounds terribly productive, n'eh? I hope so. I actually feel like I'm in the position to write something, and blogging this has got me into the typing mood, which is what I hoped it would do. Please please please let me have written 2000 words by the time I go to bed tonight. And then I will write 2000 tomorrow. Before the lovely Tom comes home. Then I get to do Christmas with him.

Oh the lovely Tom. It's been very nice this season of talking to family to be able to talk about lovely things I've done with this lovely man. It's nice to be with someone who seems to actually want me around, just as I am. *does a few carthwheels in her head because she can't do them in real life*

* the red pjs are size 8 - 10 and they fit me. They may be of the cotton jersey variety, and slightly stretchy, but fitting into them brings me an insubordiate amount of joy. Must remember to do another 100 sit ups tonight. When I have written 2000 words.

Saturday, December 22, 2007

Not swimming today

Today is one of those days. I'm having a bad day. When I don't feel like I can swim and am slowly drowning inside my own head. Everything is painfully slow and I keep sleeping randomly. My whole body aches. Working happens in tiny fits and starts.

I feel disgusting.

Disgusting and lazy.

I'm not even sure why I'm writing this. I suppose I'm trying to motivate myself. Put down somehow how I feel and read back to myself and see how stupid I sound and just pick myself up and get on with it.

Just get on with it Alex. You can't afford to do this anymore.

Not swimming today

Today is one of those days. I'm having a bad day. When I don't feel like I can swim and am slowly drowning inside my own head. Everything is painfully slow and I keep sleeping randomly. My whole body aches. Working happens in tiny fits and starts.

I feel disgusting.

Disgusting and lazy.

I'm not even sure why I'm writing this. I suppose I'm trying to motivate myself. Put down somehow how I feel and read back to myself and see how stupid I sound and just pick myself up and get on with it.

Just get on with it Alex. You can't afford to do this anymore.

Where are we?

I spent this morning running around Shirley, getting lost, using the wonders of the mobile to get Toddy to direct me to the Sorting Office, and finally picking up a parcel for Tom before it got returned to sender due to him being in France.
I am supposed to be finishing my reading before commencing the 4000 word beast of an essay on the Elephantine community of the 5th BCE in Egypt of Jewish mercenaries. Any takers to do it for me?

Mentally I'm a bit all over the place at the moment. I think I just want to hibernate.

Tom is not here. Which is very strange as the last few weeks we have been nearly inseperable. My housemate commented last night how impressed he was that Tom and I do work in each other's company and generally look out for each other. I was chuffed Pinstripe had noticed. I feel a little bit like I've lost my shadow or my reflection. Still it does give me a chance to finish wrapping his Christmas presents which you cannot do if someone's around cooking you gorgeous roast lamb or whisking you away for weekends in the countryside.

Of which we have done both recently. We stayed with his mum in a village near Andover and tramped through muddy woods with dogs in wellies, and stayed up late playing Elite Cow, the dairy cow breeding game that's fun for all the family. You purchase sperm rings for £100 a pop and then try and breed the Elite Cow of the title. Hilarious, a bit like Monopoly with cattle. It was all very cosy, and fun to help him out clearing out his childhood things, reading his school reports and the like.

The essay writing sucks when everyone else around you is being festive. I escaped home to go to the dentist and to go carolling with my family and friends. We had one very merry (read tipsy) old gent come out, and conduct us through "Hark.." and quiz us on who wrote the lyrics and music. Other than that I was chuffed as Mum had made me a Mrs Christmas cape and given me my first Christmas badge to pin on it. I'm a real grown up lady now! Now to make the beautiful red full skirted dress to wear with it...


I shall leave you with some pictures of various things....

The Roman Baths at Bath at Twilight, from the road trip Rob, Louise, Tom and I took.
Tom makes awesome gravy...

...whilst Alex comes over all interior designy and puts baubles in glasses...

...and decorates very small tree that sit under her lovely screen print.

...before sitting down to this awsom reduced leg of lamb we got in Tescos....Yum!

Where are we?

I spent this morning running around Shirley, getting lost, using the wonders of the mobile to get Toddy to direct me to the Sorting Office, and finally picking up a parcel for Tom before it got returned to sender due to him being in France.
I am supposed to be finishing my reading before commencing the 4000 word beast of an essay on the Elephantine community of the 5th BCE in Egypt of Jewish mercenaries. Any takers to do it for me?

Mentally I'm a bit all over the place at the moment. I think I just want to hibernate.

Tom is not here. Which is very strange as the last few weeks we have been nearly inseperable. My housemate commented last night how impressed he was that Tom and I do work in each other's company and generally look out for each other. I was chuffed Pinstripe had noticed. I feel a little bit like I've lost my shadow or my reflection. Still it does give me a chance to finish wrapping his Christmas presents which you cannot do if someone's around cooking you gorgeous roast lamb or whisking you away for weekends in the countryside.

Of which we have done both recently. We stayed with his mum in a village near Andover and tramped through muddy woods with dogs in wellies, and stayed up late playing Elite Cow, the dairy cow breeding game that's fun for all the family. You purchase sperm rings for £100 a pop and then try and breed the Elite Cow of the title. Hilarious, a bit like Monopoly with cattle. It was all very cosy, and fun to help him out clearing out his childhood things, reading his school reports and the like.

The essay writing sucks when everyone else around you is being festive. I escaped home to go to the dentist and to go carolling with my family and friends. We had one very merry (read tipsy) old gent come out, and conduct us through "Hark.." and quiz us on who wrote the lyrics and music. Other than that I was chuffed as Mum had made me a Mrs Christmas cape and given me my first Christmas badge to pin on it. I'm a real grown up lady now! Now to make the beautiful red full skirted dress to wear with it...


I shall leave you with some pictures of various things....

The Roman Baths at Bath at Twilight, from the road trip Rob, Louise, Tom and I took.
Tom makes awesome gravy...

...whilst Alex comes over all interior designy and puts baubles in glasses...

...and decorates very small tree that sit under her lovely screen print.

...before sitting down to this awsom reduced leg of lamb we got in Tescos....Yum!

Wednesday, December 19, 2007

blissfullyeccentric@gmail.com sent you a link to content of interest

blissfullyeccentric@gmail.com sent you a link to the following content:

Dr Tinycat to the OR
http://icanhascheezburger.com/2007/12/17/cute-kittens-dr-tinycat-to-the-or/

The sender also included this note:

I want one to make my finger better!

--
Sent via a FeedFlare link from a FeedBurner feed.
http://www.feedburner.com/fb/a/publishers/feedflare

blissfullyeccentric@gmail.com sent you a link to content of interest

blissfullyeccentric@gmail.com sent you a link to the following content:

Dr Tinycat to the OR
http://icanhascheezburger.com/2007/12/17/cute-kittens-dr-tinycat-to-the-or/

The sender also included this note:

I want one to make my finger better!

--
Sent via a FeedFlare link from a FeedBurner feed.
http://www.feedburner.com/fb/a/publishers/feedflare

Thursday, December 13, 2007

Children, Do not sew through your finger with a sewing machine.

On Tuesday evening I was sewing away at my sewing machine. I had made four Christmas presents and was sewing away at the fifth, when, all of an inch from finishing it, the fabric slipped and I caught my finger beneath the screw that holds the needle, and sewed through my finger. I caught the fleshy part just to the right of the nail on my left index finger. It went right through to the other side. In adrenaline filled schock, I tried to reverse the needle out, as I would with fabric. The adrenaline wore out and the pain was so great, that Tom helped me cut the threads and remove the needle from the machine. My knight in slightly tarnished armour then took me to Casualty.

We sat in Casualty for at least 3 and a half hours. When they came to remove it, I was given a local anaesthetic, and nitreous oxide. The lovely nurse decided that they would cut the needle in half and then slide one half out oneside and the other the other. The wire cutters were too weak and the ring cutter made a clicking noise I could hear through the clouds induced by the laughing gas. The most painful bit was when she was trying to cut it with the cutters, and they were pulling at it. I thought local anaethetics were supposed to take the pain away, but you could still feel things? If that's so, this must have been really painful. I went away with a plastered finger, feeling more than slightly sick.

Today I have two small spots on my finger, and a new respect for Tom who kept his cool when faced with my hysterics.

Children, Do not sew through your finger with a sewing machine.

On Tuesday evening I was sewing away at my sewing machine. I had made four Christmas presents and was sewing away at the fifth, when, all of an inch from finishing it, the fabric slipped and I caught my finger beneath the screw that holds the needle, and sewed through my finger. I caught the fleshy part just to the right of the nail on my left index finger. It went right through to the other side. In adrenaline filled schock, I tried to reverse the needle out, as I would with fabric. The adrenaline wore out and the pain was so great, that Tom helped me cut the threads and remove the needle from the machine. My knight in slightly tarnished armour then took me to Casualty.

We sat in Casualty for at least 3 and a half hours. When they came to remove it, I was given a local anaesthetic, and nitreous oxide. The lovely nurse decided that they would cut the needle in half and then slide one half out oneside and the other the other. The wire cutters were too weak and the ring cutter made a clicking noise I could hear through the clouds induced by the laughing gas. The most painful bit was when she was trying to cut it with the cutters, and they were pulling at it. I thought local anaethetics were supposed to take the pain away, but you could still feel things? If that's so, this must have been really painful. I went away with a plastered finger, feeling more than slightly sick.

Today I have two small spots on my finger, and a new respect for Tom who kept his cool when faced with my hysterics.

Tuesday, December 11, 2007

Things are wrapping up...




Sarah's hoody, all done, at last. I'm really chuffed with this, I think it looks really good, it fits her like a dream, and the little details like the cuff lining make me smile.

King Cole Double Knit Acrylic
4mm circular and dpn needles
My own pattern.

Things are wrapping up...




Sarah's hoody, all done, at last. I'm really chuffed with this, I think it looks really good, it fits her like a dream, and the little details like the cuff lining make me smile.

King Cole Double Knit Acrylic
4mm circular and dpn needles
My own pattern.

Saturday, December 08, 2007

Thank you to the lady who restored my faith in humanity

Today is not a good day. I started it by removing all my kitchen equipment into my room, because my housemates were using it and leaving it dirty for weeks on end. I know its an extreme move, but some of it was growing mould.

Then it started pouring it down.

I had to fight my way through christmas shopping crowds to get plastic cups for the Chaplaincy meal.

I feel grumpy and damp and behind on my work.

The one bright spot was the lady who stood in an empty car sparking space in the very busy car park to save it for Tom, when some idiot in front of him started playing silly buggers with the one way system. There are some nice people in the world after all.

Thank you to the lady who restored my faith in humanity

Today is not a good day. I started it by removing all my kitchen equipment into my room, because my housemates were using it and leaving it dirty for weeks on end. I know its an extreme move, but some of it was growing mould.

Then it started pouring it down.

I had to fight my way through christmas shopping crowds to get plastic cups for the Chaplaincy meal.

I feel grumpy and damp and behind on my work.

The one bright spot was the lady who stood in an empty car sparking space in the very busy car park to save it for Tom, when some idiot in front of him started playing silly buggers with the one way system. There are some nice people in the world after all.

Monday, December 03, 2007

Mwhahahha!

Using blonde girls as bait.

Running around campus.

Heartbeat racing.

And I can't tell you why!